Southies v/s NorthiesMy first sojourn to the North (north of South India, I mean), and I've already formed enough stereotypes to last a lifetime:
a) Southies love curds and buttermilk. Aravindan, Karthik and gang have a special order for curd at every meal. Northies don't have the same affinity, but if they are forced to eat, they add sugar to it. I've not yet seen a Southie who adds sugar to curds (they add pickles instead :), or one who prefers lassi to buttermilk+salt ... Bongs think curds is under-prepared food, and add enough sugar to make it payasam :(
b) Northies wear chappals in their room, and they'll have atleast ten pairs of footwear - one for canteen, one for toilet, one for bathing, one for class, one for going out, one for jogging, one for formal occasions. OTOH, Southies don't usually allow people to wear chappals inside Southies' rooms, and they don't unnecessarily enrich the chappal-makers.
c) Northies think Hindi is the only language of India and can't understand how a Tamilian like me be born and brought up in Karnataka, and can't speak Hindi. Southies think English is the common language of India, and can't believe the nerve of the Northies who keep speaking Hindi all the time.
I saw an interesting comment in a Pakistani online newspaper's "Letters to editor" section, where a guy simply can't believe that many South Indians don't know Hindi. Hehe, welcome to India dude !
d) Northies drink the dicoction that they optimistically call "coffee" and believe that is the best drink they've ever had. Since Southies can't take it at all (they are used to the filter coffee), they drink tea instead. So, ironically, a lot of Southies drink tea and a lot of Northies drink coffee.
e) Staple food for Northie (in hostel): Rice + dhal or Roti + sabji
Staple food for Southie (in hostel): anything + pickles or rice + curds/buttermilk + pickles (of course)
In general, Southies like "wet" liquid spicy food, Northies like dry sweet food.
f) Northies punctuate every sentence with the word "saale", either as prefix or postfix, making you wonder the real nature of relationship :P
Since no language has a monopoly among Southies, the Kannadigas use "lo", the Tamilians use "da". I don't know about about others ..
I'm sure other Southies have much to add, and Northies have much to counter-attack, so I suppose I'll stop here ...
Update: I'd forgotten the most important of all ... and that is:
g) Northies assume everybody has a surname. And that must be a family name. And not the father's name. They can't believe that my name is only Sridhar. Narasimhan is my father's name. Calling me by my apparent surname is not acceptable. Period.
The biggest problem is when calling call centres such as HutchCare. I don't know what they teach their euphemistic-termed customer care executives, but I get so pissed off when someone addresses me "Hello Mr. Narashimham", "Sorry to keep you waiting, Mr. Narashimham", "I'm sorry, Mr. Narashimham" ... despite telling them with gritted teeth that I'm "Mr. Sridhar" and not some "Mr. Narashimham". Yeah, I don't know why Northies add the extra 'h' in my father's name ... that happens even in project reports where the bakra who ends up adding finishing touches to a project report inadvertently but almost always mis-spells my name... Add to the fact that Northies replace 'r' with 'd' like Kharagpur is pronounced as Khadagpur, my name starts sounding really foreign to me ...
Poor dear me ....